why i love mayuyu

so i've done a "why i love akb48", i guess it's time to dedicate one blog post to my kami-oshi, watanabe mayu, also known as mayuyu.

gonna elaborate a bit on how i came to know this gorgeous girl named mayuyu.

a few days before 22 june 2013, i realised i had free tickets to Asia Style Collection and it so happened AKB48 was attending. before this event, i knew of the existence of akb, but i merely listened to their songs. so i did a mini 'crash course' on akb, and the 6 members who were attending this event. since i'm on twitter all day, what other methods to better know about akb than to follow some akb fan accounts? so i did.

after the event, i was still following the fan account, of course. but i didn't understand many terms and tweets because i'm not even into akb yet. then one fine day in july, i was scrolling through my timeline as per normal and i saw many pictures tweeted by that fan account. the pictures were off-shots from Koisuru Fortune Cookie mv. i clicked on a couple of pictures, and this one girl in one picture caught my attention.

her name was Watanabe Mayu.

i decided to google her, and the rest were history. i have a blurred memory of me coming to know about her solo single, Rappa Renshuuchuu, and also akb's single, Koisuru Fortune Cookie. that was the start.

as i became more involved in this akb fandom, i came to know more terms, one of which being "oshimen". oshi means to push, men is part of the romaji 'menba' which means member. which means the one member you support the most. of course, i chose watanabe mayu, aka mayuyu. as time went by, i knew more girls, and this term "kami-oshi" came into my vocab. kami means God, and oshi means to push as stated above. which means the #1 member you support the most among all girls. mayuyu became my kami-oshi, while i added more girls into my rankings.

enough of the elaboration, let's get to why i love her. the reasons stated below are simply some of the reasons i can think of currently, of course, the list is never-ending. ♥

#1: she exudes an unspeakable aura

you may know Jeanette has been my favourite since 2009 (she still is, by the way). why do i love jeanette that much? jeanette has this something to her that really attracted me, and i can't describe it in words. it's some sort of a feeling.

well, mayuyu has a similar something that really attracted me too. i wouldn't say the exact same aura as jeanette, but something similar. for both jeanette and mayuyu, somehow i just became a fan of them (which progressively advanced to a hardcore fan) without me knowing. like i don't just choose her out of the many girls available and label her as my oshimen. how do i put it.. for my #2-#16 rankings of AKB girls, i decided on the rank for each girl, for example, okada nana being my second oshimen. this ranking was intentional. on the other hand, mayuyu being my kami-oshi was something really unexpected. as everyone knows, before i got into akb, i loved jeanette. before i got into akb, i wasn't even interested in the overseas entertainment industry. but, unknowingly, and unintentionally, mayuyu became my kami-oshi.

and this unintentional/unknowing feel is that something mayuyu has, that actually made me venture out, in a sense, into the overseas entertainment industry. it's really hard to describe and some may not understand what i mean, but this is exactly why i call it an "unspeakable aura".

#2: just look at her. she's beautiful

when she joined akb at the age of 12, she was such a cute little girl. as time grew, she was slowly outgrowing that 'cute' style and became more of a mature beauty. she's just gorgeous. and what better way to show how beautiful she is than to let her pictures speak? i shan't elaborate any longer on this point.

cute mayuyu in her signature twintails:

look how beautiful she is now ♥

#3: i love her unique, distinguishable voice

when i first heard her singing, i was kind of shocked. to be really honest, at that time when i wasn't a hardcore fan yet, i disliked girls with high-pitched voices. but that was exactly what mayuyu voice was like. high-pitched. as a casual fan, i was just a teeny, little bit put off by it. but time passed and i soon got to accept it. after all, 90% of why i like mayuyu is because of her aura. when i accepted it, i got to appreciate her really unique and distinguishable voice.

for someone like me who doesn't listen to music as a hobby before i got into akb, you can give me songs of say snsd or 2ne1 or something, and i would say the voices sound exactly the same. i could never tell whose voice belonged to who. for me to actually distinguish mayuyu's voice among 15 other girls is just.. excellent. that's how unique it is. and i love it.

and again, what better way to show her unique voice than to put a mv of her second solo single, Otona Jellybeans (i'm being biased by choosing her second single because it's pink and dreamy and i love it) and one of her coupling songs, Sayonara no Hashi here?



#4: she dares to announce that she wants to be #1.
first, let me clarify. i'm not saying the other girls do not dare to do so, but mayuyu was the first person i ever knew to give such a bold statement. other girls definitely have the same quality, but since mayuyu was the first and she's the first member i knew, this is one of the quality that actually caught me off guard.

first, if you watch mediacorp's Star Awards, and if it so happens one actress/actor decides to say this during her/his speech:

"I want to be the best"

chances are you get people bashing her/him for being arrogant. as a mediacorp fan for 5 years, all the speeches i listened to were just thanking his/her supporters and family. that's all. do you hear Rui En, who has clinched best actress award for idk how many times (i've forgotten how many because i've drifted apart from the mediacorp fandom), proclaim "i want to win best actress next year again"? nope. do you hear Jeanette, who so far has not clinched any best actress award, declare "i want to win best actress next year"? nope. they simply thanked their fans.

so when i heard mayuyu declare "Next year, I want to be centre/#1" or something along those lines during her speech when she was voted #2 in 2012, obviously, i was shocked. and scared that she would be hated. and also admiring her for her boldness to announce such a statement. but it turned out okay. nothing bad happened to mayuyu. and when time passed by (i use this phrase so many times lol), i got to know more girls who also made really daring statements. even kenkyuuseis (trainees) who just joined less than a year ago declared that they want to be the centre in the future. so, as stated again, not only mayuyu has this quality, but all the girls. 

couldn't find the 2012 election speech, so here's a subbed 2013 election speech. she talked about what she said in 2012 about wanting to be #1 at 1:18-1:28:


in summary, here's the comparison between mediacorp and akb.

Best Actress / Voted 1st in Senbatsu Election
Rui En (Best Actress): basically thanking her fans for her support.
Sasshi (Voted 1st): declaring she wants to be first again next year, and of course thanking her fans too.

Nominated for Best Actress but did not win it/Voted 2nd in Senbatsu Election

Jeanette (Nominated): thanking her fans, as usual.
Mayuyu (Voted #2 in 2012's election): declaring she wants to win #1 next year (but she did not, sadly) and of course thanking her fans.

for now, these are the points i can think of right now. i could go on and on about mayuyu but right now my mind only has these 4 points. but you get what i mean, i love mayuyu.

a long post that was planned to be short

was stalking my blog and saw this blog post dated 11 september 2013. seeing how many of these facts are considered 'outdated', i shall edit them in red:

decided to post some facts bout me, just for the fun of it. if anybody ever reads this blog, then these facts are also for y'all to know me better! but for now, i guess it's just to pass time.
1. i really adore jeanette aw, fukuda mayuko, watanabe mayu & umeda ayaka.
-> i really LOVE LOVE LOVE jeanette aw and watanabe mayu.
2. i support kamiki ryunosuke & hongo kanata.
-> i support okada nana, kato rena, tashima meru, owada nana and fukuda mayuko (non-AKB).
3. accountancy has been my dream course since i was p6.
-> despite accountancy being my dream course since 12 years old, i made a decision to study financial informatics.
4. i've never spoken chinese at home or to my friends in my entire life. (conversation kind)
5. i've secured a C5 for chinese Os & i'm very contented with that!
6. i have size 41-42 feet.
-> confirmed: i have size EUR42/US10 feet.
7. 1.67m
8. i really love piglets.
9. i like amath and emath the most.
10. i kind of like chem, but i wouldn't choose to study science no matter what, because it has lots of words.
-> i hate chem now lol
11. i knew touch typing at age 6.
12. when i was young, i used the computer (WINDOWS 98 HAHA) for educational games and to type endlessly.
13. planning to become a financial accountant in the future.
-> planning to become a financial ANALYST in the future. *-*
14. i love pastel colours, especially pink!
15. 95% of my items are bought online.
16. i don't believe in teenage dating because they always end a few months later. at most, a year.
17. i am learning japanese.
18. i don't know how to order food from foodcourts / hawker centres bc i'd have to speak in chinese, and i'm scared i will pronounce wrongly and people will judge me.
19. i have very low self-confidence.
20. i can never study at home and at cafes/fast food restaurants.
21. i love travelling, my dream is to travel round the world.
22. i'm planning to study in japan's rikkyo uni / australia's curtin uni.
-> currently in a dilemma whether to study uni in japan or english-based countries. 
23. i love to eat. but i don't eat seafood, fish, disgusting things like snails (and similar) and vegetables.
24. i have lots of accessories but too lazy to wear them out.
25. a big HTC fan. HTC > iphone.
26. i don't like to use mainstream phones like samsung & iphone.
27. i hate mainstream things like geek, bart, etc.
28. 85% of my room is pink.
29. a total lover of meat, especially chicken and beef.
30. i love dance, and i'm planning to relearn ballet after Os.
-> plan was never fulfilled. i love dance still, planning to join a dance cca in poly.
31. i suspect i'm tone deaf.
32. i have never drank alcohol. (underage drinking is too mainstream)
33. i hate smokers since young, and still do.
34. i love to drink soups. i practically drink all soups. but if the soup contains ingredients(?), i won't eat them.
35. whenever i eat shark fin at dinners, i only drink the soup and never once did i eat the things inside bc it's disgusting.
36. i don't like aquatic animals. they're disgusting.
37. i love animals.
38. not a nature lover. i'd pick city life over countryside life anytime.
39. i have 2 photos with jeanette, met her 11 times or so and have 6 of her autographs.
-> i have 3 photos with jeanette. met her uncountable times and have 6 going 7 pieces of her autograph.
40. i dislike black and other dull colours.
41. i won three 2shot tickets for mayuyu!
42. i am going to have 2shots with my kamioshi, ni-oshi & san-oshi (this term sounds weird lol) and other members i support that aren't in my top 3.
43. i hate all of my previous two jobs.
44. contrary to others, i still prefer working life over schooling life because there's no homework in working life, and you don't need to mug the night before for tests/exams.
45. i'm psyched for my course, financial informatics!!
46. i love sp.

wow, i didn't know i changed so much since september, which was just 5 months back. from a casual AKB fan to a hardcore fan. from a person who lives for dramas to a person who doesn't watch any dramas anymore, except for certain dramas that caught my attention. or if the leads interest me.

and yes, accountancy, the course i've been living for since my entire life, wasn't my first choice. even till now i can't believe what i did. everyone who follows me on twitter/knows me in real life will definitely know i love accountancy and all. i managed to get the points to enter accoutancy, but i decided not to. as stated, i still can't believe it. w o w.

as for university, the main reason why i wanna study in japan because i love the language. it's the one and only thing that i've found passion for. and it's not a one-off thing, where i declare "i'm gonna learn jap!" and it never gets fulfilled months later. for the first time in my life, i found something i'm so, so passionate about that i can't describe how passionate i am in words. well of course other benefits to studying in japan would be attending AKB events, but that's a bonus. of course it'd be nice to study in japan because of the convenience of AKB, but i doubt it'd be the main, sole reason as to why i would like to study there.

but i'm having second thoughts because the medium of teaching would be japanese. well that wouldn't be much of a problem, i'm planning to achieve JLPT N1 japanese by the age of 19 (i'd be 20 when i enter university). but the thing is, since i'd be learning in japanese, it would definitely be easier to work in japan than other countries, and i'm sure there's a business law module and it'd be about japanese business law, if i'm not wrong? i still have not decided if i really want to spend my life in japan, working in japan, settling down there. and it'd be hard to get a job in singapore if i study in japan, with the main problem being the language. well you can always come back to singapore to work but i'm guessing if i'm an employer i'd employ someone who studied modules in english than one who studied modules in japanese. of course, this is just my presumption, and i have zero knowledge in business since i've not started my diploma lol.

why don't i want to settle down in japan? well, it seems like the household culture is still quite traditional, the guy being superior over the girl, (correct me if i'm wrong, but even j-dramas dated 2013 still seem to show this scenario). like females tend to become a housewife and dedicate their whole life to bringing up the family and serving the husband. it seems too.. traditional for me lol. and another thing, (i don't mean to be rude), but the husbands in japan seem to smoke a lot lol. (i'm not discriminating them, but since young whenever i accidentally breathe in cigarette smoke i feel super, super, super nauseous). i'm not saying it's compulsory to marry a japanese man, but if you work there you will most probably settle down there? and of course japanese men dominate the japanese population lol. which is what bothers me. i don't wanna live this kind of life in the future HAHAHAH.

..and of course, less than 1% of the population are Christians.

as much as i love japanese (language), after writing down and sorting out my thoughts, it seems unfeasible.. at least studying in countries like australia, new zealand enables you to have module exemptions since they recognise our diplomas. and you learn in english, and well studying overseas in these countries are really common so it'd still be easy to find a job in singapore. and i can always go japan for a holiday or a 3-month trip right?

/okay i didn't expect a simple post where i just wanted to highlight the changes in me to turn out into a thought-sorting-out time/

/and i actually concluded on a topic i've been worrying about recently/

/i think too far into my future, right? i'm only 16 and thinking about life lol/

悲しい。嬉しい。

so many things happened since i last blogged i don't even know where to begin. i shall try tho!

minirant;

a rather sad thing happened recently. my beloved htc one got sent for repair and i'm stuck with a phone that has a 600MHz single-core snapdragon s1 processor. MY LIFE SUCKS SO BADLY I WANNA CRY. this phone apparently has no internal camera, no flash, and NO AUTOFOCUS. and i can't help but emphasize the processor. IT'S A FREAKING 600MHZ SINGLE-CORE SNAPDRAGON S1. THE FIRST VERSION OF SNAPDRAGON. AND IT'S SINGLE-CORE. AND IT'S LESS THAN 1GHZ. SERIOUSLY??????? this is akin to killing me. even my previous htc phone (which is too spoilt to be used now) that was released a year before than this phone i'm using has a 1GHz single-core snapdragon s2 processor. BUT MAIN THING IS MY HTC ONE HAS A 1.7GHZ QUAD-CORE SNAPDRAGON 600 PROCESSOR AND I CAN NEVER SURVIVE WITH <1GHZ SINGLE-CORE PROCESSOR ANYMORE. i lead a very sad life. it's another 4 days with this phone before my beloved baby comes back to me. i wonder if i can survive till wednesday though..

okay first real event, went uss with mx!!!

so we were super yolo and bought tix online cuz got 15% discount or something and we decided to reach there early to queue but it turns out they let people in before the park officially opens. so stupid HAHAHA. we literally rushed to transformers right after we entered the park. it was fun HAHA. then we went to mummy and suddenly i became super afraid and me & mx were super afraid but continued walking to the ride i don't even know why. mummy was super super super scary the drops were super scary.

and of course photos!! didn't take any photos with them when i first went uss 2 years ago, no idea why but yeah. photo spam coming up

then after these main 2 attractions we took all the thrilling rides then slowly took every ride till it was lunch. then we went out for lunch cuz uss food too expensive. HAHAHA. then after lunch continued taking and retaking the rides and somehow mx was super scared of canopy flyer even tho it's quite boring HAHAAHAH. towards the end of the day we wanted to marathon transformers ride but there was literally NO ONE there and it's boring without other strangers' screaming so we stopped.

(omg why do i have twist signs in every photo)

oh and my leg decided to be weird that day and out of the blue there was a sharp pain. and it'd stop temporarily and then came back. i have weird feet.

but overall it's a super fun day!! ate my childhood favourite ice cream for a whopping price of $5. totally not worth it but oh well, it's super rare and you don't get to go uss to buy this often so.. yeah.

oh and o's & posting results are out!!!

so apparently it's a known fact that i wanted to get into accountancy so badly and i studied so hard for humans for the sake of being able to get into accountancy, since it's based on ELR2B2-B score and humans is a relevant subject. but when i went sp open house, i talked to some guy from FI and guess what. my dream course changed. i don't even know why. was in a dilemma whether to choose accountancy or fi. on results day, i received results that were eligible for accountancy and FI and i decided to go for fi. i kind of had some regrets after that cuz FI doesn't require humans, and i could've studied harder for maths & sci and not focus that much on humans. but thinking back, i failed my accountancy dpa interview. probably it's God's way of telling me i shouldn't go accountancy. so i stuck to fi and hopefully it turns out well. i shall trust God's plan for my life. yup so anyway i got into fi, and i'm looking forward to school cuz i can finally learn what i'm interested in instead of stupid subjects like maths and science and gp and what not. (heh too cool for jc)

OH OH OH and the biggest thing that affected me so much was my 2nd job.

at crocs. yes you can start laughing at me cuz i worked at crocs. but anyway, it's really stupid. during the briefing that took 1 hr cuz need explain all the govt laws and how they settle things, they didn't tell me my exact job scope and that the uniforms were payable. and me and mx even requested for a second piece of uniform cuz 1 piece isn't enough if we work consecutive days. the hr manager didn't even bothered to tell us it's payable and just gave us the uniform. AND he even gave us a jacket.

so anyway on my first day of work, i realised the uniforms were $20/ea and the jacket costed $40. which totals to $80. if i quit before 3 months i'd have to pay for these uniforms. and when the shop supervisor was briefing me, i realised i was a salesperson. which is stupid because i didn't apply for a salesperson position, and that stupid hr manager didn't inform me that i actually have a sales target and i need to hit that target. BUT MAIN POINT IS, I HATE SALESPEOPLE SINCE YOUNG. and i got cheated, in a way, into becoming one.

job became something dreadful, even worse than noel, and i started to slack and not sell the shoes. because i didn't want to sell in the first place. i got nagged, but whatever. i took lots of long breaks and tried to delay my lunch break by a few minutes and went toilet for a very long time. all because i didn't want to sell. and one day i finally submitted my resignation. i had to pay for my shoes that were compulsory to wear, but the hr manager did state that so i'm okay with it. as for the uniforms, i'm gonna fight my way cuz hr manager didn't properly inform us, so it's super unreasonable for them to force me to pay.

not to mention, i bet the management thinks they hired robots. cuz they want their staff to work like 10-12hrs/day, and, AND unless you work full shift (which is 13hrs, 9:30am-10:30pm), you only get 1 break. so assuming you work from 9:30am - 9pm, you get only one break. which is really unreasonable. lunch and dinner times are around 12-1pm and 6-7pm respectively, but we are only allowed ONE break? are we robots? i'm glad i quit early because i'm quite sure if i continued this eating habit of eating only breakfast and one meal that is neither lunch nor dinner, i'd have some weird eating disorder or whatever soon. seriously though. even in noel, as long as you work past lunch & dinner time, you get lunch and dinner breaks. even if you work 11am-8pm, you get 2 breaks. how does crocs handle their staff, i wonder. i bet their office staffs have proper mealtimes and we mere retail crews are apparently too low-class to eat meals at proper times.

overall, a super bad experience. not only do their shoes suck, their management suck too. yes i'm openly writing this on my blog. even noel, where i had some really tough times there, was much, much more pleasant compared to this job. i'm so glad i quit.

lastly, CNY!! :)

so it's that time of the year where you look good and collect angbaos HAHAHA. okay not much to be elaborated here cuz nothing really interesting actually, so i'm just gonna put my ootds for day 1 and day 3 here. mehhh

oh and on cny eve i decided to cut my fringe into bangs and i didn't really think properly cuz it was cny the next day, it's either i start cny with my old hairstyle or a new one so i went for the latter. it was really weird but i soon got used to it soooo.. yeah. (i need to find another way to end my sentences lol)

lol please do not judge me for taking ootds this way cuz my external camera is spoilt (which is exactly why i sent it for repair)

--------------------

and this marks my life so far.

anyway, just realised my whole life revolves around actresses and idols and actresses and idols and i have zero social life. this is bad.